Hvar

No time in Hvar for those predisposed towards enjoying life would be even vaguely close to fulfilment without a visit to Carpe Diem.

I'm no clubber these days. Aside from a few late nights in bars in Berlin and London, I've not set foot in a 'club' since my last visit to Carpe Diem in July 2013.

This isn't your typical nightclub. It is pretty much the only thing on the island of Stipkanska, which is a ten minute boat ride from the harbour of Hvar Town. And this is its appeal. Boats start to take people from Carpe Diem's sister bar on Hvar around midnight, and begin the process of ferrying in the region of a thousand people onto an otherwise deserted island to party until dawn.

It costs roughly around 15 quid to get in. Like all clubs the music is hit and miss - sometimes it is amazing, with the best DJs in the World descending over the summer. And on other times it is distinctly average.

The crowd couldn't be more mixed - everyone from your average local to Prince Harry has danced the night away here. But don't let that out you off too much...

When Matt, Rosh and I decided to venture here on a Sunday night, we had done so because there was rain forecast for the Monday. Better to have a late one on a day when there would be little to do because of the elements the next day, we thought to ourselves.

The boat journey is always a great experience, with the moon shining over the water and the old town in Hvar lit up in the distance. And you always get chatting to random strangers from all over the world on board. On our journey, we were befriended by a group of young Italians. It is typical when foreigners discover you are English that they ask what football team you support. Matt and Rosh don't really have a club to speak of, so it was left to me to declare my allegiance to Norwich City. I got one of those looks that I've had in so many places all over the world that basically says 'I was expecting you to say Chelsea or Man United, who the fuck are they?'

As we got off the boat, the Italians started an either ironic or friendly boisterous chant of 'NORWICH! NORWICH!' - they were Parma fans, and who the fuck were they?

We paid our entrance fee and strolled into one of the best venues for a night out there can possibly be. The main club area is set within the confines of a forest of pine trees. Behind that is an outdoor swimming pool, sun loungers and another bay of sea - all designed for the day time trade but available at night. It's proper good. I am always reminded of the woods area at the latitude festival when I come to Carpe Diem. It's probably just the smell of pine and dancing in July in the middle of nowhere, but hopefully those who have been to the 'tude get my drift...

The club (or should that be island?) got busy very quickly. Deep, funky house blazed out and the smiles on the faces of everyone - ours included - were palpable. I was chatted up by girls young enough to be my daughter, I smoked for the first time in God knows how long and generally had outrageously good fun.

It was around 4am that the heavens opened and something dawned on me. We had decided to go out on Sunday night because it was going to rain on Monday. But although we were very much at the club's Sunday show, in reality it was a place that opened in the small hours of Monday morning. So basically we were in the open air on an island on the day it was destined to chuck it down. Quite how we hadn't realised this when making our plans I didn't know, but none of us gave a toss.

Torrential rain came down through the pine trees, but if anything it seemed to galvanise the crowd. Nobody was going to get cold in the heat, so getting collectively drenched was - if anything - something that made people smile more and dance harder. Then, all of a sudden, the realisation we were at a club rather than some kind of rave became apparent. The DJs didn't want their equipment getting wet, so an announcement was made that the music was being stopped...

'Let's get out of here,' Rosh said to me.
'No! This will only be temporary, and when the music starts again, it will be amazing,' I predicted.

Everyone tried to find cover, which was difficult in an open air club during a rain storm. We chatted to some guys from Croydon. The Italians saw me and shouted NORWICH! A Norwegian wandered up to us and the people close by sheltering around me and said we should sing together. 'Repeat after me. Everyone listen to me and then sing!' I'm not entirely sure what we sang - it appeared to be little more than random chanting - but it did occur to me later that I could have been involved in saying something, involuntarily, in Norwegian that I might find fucking offensive! It did serve as a reminder of how in times of difficulty, if you can describe trying to shelter from rain at Carpe Diem as that, people will respond to leadership. This guy basically walked up to 20 of us and said we should sing after him, and we did. Mind you, everyone was drunk...

By 5am it was obvious the music wasn't coming back on, so we decided to get the boat back. The rain was still falling when we got to the Hvar, but it didn't stop a group of people dancing around the square in the old town - to no music. I briefly joined them before realising I looked like a fool. We walked home, despite Rosh's protestations that we should jump in a taxi - even though there weren't any to take. He still timed our walk home to prove it took longer than the 15 we predicted, and was not shy to point out it actually ended up taking 18...

A big night out like the one we had at Carpe Diem was always going to render us tired for a while. And so we spent the next few days generally chilling around Hvar Town. Normally I would head out to a different island every day, but we were content to have late starts and just mooch about. Especially as there was a woman in a crepe shop Matt had taken a fancy to...

Unfortunately the persistent purchasing of stuff from this place did not lead to anything more than a substantial amount of un-eaten food in our apartment. We then all went our separate ways - Rosh and Matt on the boat to Split to fly home to London, me on the boat to Korcula en route to Mljet...